D@dalos - Peace Education: Communication - The Key to Solving Conflicts

Peace Education

Communication - The Key to Solving Conflicts

Successful communication is one of the keys to constructively dealing with conflicts. "He who talks, holds his fire": a reduction to this one common denominator is a frequent way of summing up the function of communication. In professionalised or even ritual form, communication plays a key role in all conciliation and arbitration processes. Subsequently, imparting communicative skills is central to peace education.

Communication is disrupted or heavily affected in conflicts. How can communication be approached in a first step to make a common view of the problem feasible, so that the fundamental conflicting problem can be understood.

The initial requirement for this is the will to add another, fresh viewpoint to your own field of perception, and to attempt to understand what the other party means. There is no room for threats, blame or assertions here. These factors need to be replaced by cooperative patterns of explanation and understanding.

Various aids can be useful for this:

	Advance discussions/framework discussions serving to smooth the way and make decisions on locations, meetings and procedures without approaching the conflict in itself.
	Other (neutral) surroundings which ensure that no one has a 'home advantage'; a modified, external framework can also make a change in relations feasible.
	Specific and accepted rules: non-structured communication between (hostile) parties to a conflict can easily lead to uncontrolled escalation. The application of agreed rules allows the parties to come into contact with one another again.
	Third parties: they act as catalysts, ensure that rules are upheld and attempt to contribute to settling the conflict without taking sides or submitting themselves to the fundamental question of the conflict.

Communication Rules Provide Aid in Conflicting Situations

	Talk about yourself, use the first person singular.
	Keep to the point, do not insult, hurt or provoke the other party.
	Recognize the needs of the other party.
	Keep to the subject, do not stray.
	Let the other party have his say, listen and do not interrupt.
	Search for a common solution.
	Keep to the agreed rules.

Words Trigger Both Positive and Negative Emotions - Be Aware of This

What emotions are triggered in you when someone

	Gives you orders (“stop that now.”)
	Threatens you ("if you don't stop that now, I will)
	Tells you ("you can't do that.”)
	Accuses you ("you’re always so loud.”).
	Judges your behavior ("you provoke me continually.”)
	Interrogates you ("where were you yesterday evening?”)

What is More or Less Helpful in a Conflict Discussion?

The following are helpful and have a de-escalating effect	The following are less helpful and have a escalating effect
Consciously saying hello and goodbye	Not saying hello, not saying goodbye
Eye contact	Lack of eye contact
Argumentation and reasoning	Justifying yourself
Trying to grasp what the other party is saying	Making accusations
The ability to convince	Putting things off
Finding approval	Talking at cross-purposes
Enquiring	Trying to convince
Drawing attention to your own vulnerability	Showing no interest
Allowing the other party to have his say	Butting in
Avoiding emotive words	Using emotive words
An attentive, open body posture	An inattentive, closed body posture
Humor	Humourlessness, embitteredness
Having time	Having no time
Taking conflicting arguments seriously	Only seeing your own side of things
Separating the personal and the factual	Personal attacks

Body Language in Conflict

Body language plays a central role in conflict de-escalation and constructively settling conflicts. Besides facial and bodily expressions, body language includes your tone of voice, clothing and the manner in which rooms are decorated.

Social psychologist, Siegfried Frey, from Duisburg in Germany, supports the view that non-verbal and verbal expression play a central role for people in the communication process. Body language is understood by the recipient on an unconscious level and taken as a reason for acting.

Shaking hands as a daily ritual of politeness hindered your opponent in hitting you in ancient times. Barrier signals (for instance folding your arms) allow you to maintain your distance and is also perceived in this manner, while balled fists communicate determination and drive.

Credibility, reconciliation and apology require an 'open' body posture in order to be recognised and accepted as such.

Symbolic actions play a particularly important role in ending conflicts, both in the private and public sphere. Gestures of humility and reconciliation signalise that the phase of confrontation has come to an end, and that a new phase in the relationship has begun.

Non-verbal body language is of central meaning to constructively dealing with conflicts, since signs of escalation or de-escalation can be given here, both at a conscious and unconscious level.

What always has to be taken into consideration here is that non-verbal communication is culturally specific and not universal. Its specific meaning depends on the respective cultural context.

Learning Body Language

In conflicting situations, partners in conflict also communicate their mutual attitudes in essential terms using body language. Body language constitutes a direct expression even if we claim something else in words. Misunderstandings and problems can easily result if feelings are wrongly expressed or perceived.

The following are elements of body language:

	Facial expressions
	Bodily expressions
	Body posture
	Clothing and jewellery
	Distance and space

Practice:

We express the following emotions through body language:

Aggression - anger - threat - violence - coolness - waiting and seeing - fear - submission - boredom - softness - hardness - openness - closedness - indecision - assertive ability - stress - tension - relaxedness - ability to compromise - explicitness - ambiguity.

Comment on approach:

Each term is written on a sheet of paper. The participants receive two sheets of paper with the terms written on them and use pantomime to act them out. The other members of the group attempt to divulge the term being referred to. Appraisal takes place in relation to two questions:

	(How) can feelings be expressed in such a way that others are capable of understanding them and reacting appropriately?
	Is it possible to perceive and interpret other people’s feelings correctly?

[Autor: Günther Gugel, Tübingen Institute for Peace Education; Editor: Ragnar Müller]

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Subjects: Human Rights  I Examples I Democracy I Parties I Europe I  Globalisation I United Nations I Sustainability

Methods:    Teaching Politics    II    Peace Education II    Methods

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